Oh my God, my back is killing.

Oh, well.
Here's 9 things you should NEVER do. From experience, of course (well, most of them).

1) Never, ever karate chop a gate. Just don't do it.
2) Never do your business in a guest's house- you don't know how well their toilet flushes and you don't know if they have backup air freshener.
3) Never look up if you know a pigeon is passing by. You may just get a little surprise party on your face.
4) Never go through with a dare that could humiliate you forever.
5) Never hold a fish in your hands unless you're saving it. It just so happens that in the act of saving it, I almost killed it at the same time. Close call, people, close call.
6) Never let someone get away with insulting you- at least not without a mark on their face (or a bruise in their ego, for you pacifists.)
7) Never wear white clothes if you know its going to rain. If you do and  you see people staring, don't say I didn't warn ya!
8) Never reply to a conversation you wish to continue with a one word answer.
9) Never regret your past- it will never change.